I keep writing my reviews and short stories but I don't write my thoughts like I used to. I used to write down what was happening, what was going on going on in my head. I don't do that anymore. No real reason. I think a lot in the car. You cant really write down your deep thought process while driving. I think in 2018 I need to get back to writing those thoughts. I need to get them out. I need to not lay with them in my head for so long. I can't let them fester. Not that what I have to say may be important but I think it is a great way to get your head straight.
After this weekend's events it looks like I might have some time to write. I might be able to get it all in word instead of just talking to myself in the car on the way home.
I started some healthy habits this year. At least I believe they are healthy habits. I am trying to be more considerate of others. Shocker I know, but I need to step back a little. I need to let people decide that their decisions might be wrong, even if I can see that wrong decision being made. That will also include not allowing myself to take care of those so much. I am really quick to say "I can, I will, let me help" but you rarely get it back these days. Taking care of others I believe is a thing of the past, its sad. Respect is out the window.
I have been following a path for the last few years that has developed a stronger relationship with my faith. It's like working out and exercise, you don't become knowledgeable and full of your faith over night. It has taken a long time to come to terms that life isn't really in my hands. That there is a higher power. As any sinner though I know that my journey will never be over I can always improve. I continue to study and learn. I think my church family has helped enormously with that. I have gotten close to some pretty awesome ladies that are on my path and have helped me with my faith. It's amazing how just talking to someone about a certain subject can change your whole prospective.
I have been reading and reviewing for over a year. I am in love with this hobby. It helps me escape, it helps me remember that I am NOT just a mom and wife. You might not think so but it does. The stories I have the privilege of reading take you to a world that isn't yours. They can erase a bad day, a sad feeling, or just take you on a journey for a little bit. The reviewing was new at first but has gotten easier. I've developed some pretty solid friendships in the book world.
Mommy world is still full time and still my heart. My girls are growing, learning, and doing so much now. As busy as life gets sometimes, there are moments I sit back and thank God that he choose me to guide these little people.
There is plenty in this world I don't understand. There is plenty of hatred and jealousy and meanness but I really try to step back and not get pulled in. I try to stay positive. I try to keep my temper in check. I try to think of all sides, although sometimes that is the hardest. I am really good at ignoring the bad to bring out the good.
So 2018, trying to write more, trying to get more off my chest, and trying to continue working on me. Life was not made to be easy, it was made to be worked for and I am up for the challenge. Thankfully I have a solid marriage, great kids, and a great family with friends who are around for all of this.